


all i have

by pendules



Category: World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 13:24:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12190779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pendules/pseuds/pendules
Summary: It’s only after — after when they’re away from the cameras and the lights. When they’realoneand free to collapse from exhaustion, free to shed the brave, defiant faces they have to keep on for the crowd. It’s onlynowthat he can finally look Dean in the eyes and say it out loud."I was scared for a bit there," he admits.Dean just shrugs it off, like it’s nothing. "Nah, it was fine. I mean, we cut it pretty close at the end, but that’s just how we work best."Maybehehasn’t entirely taken off his armour yet, but he can’t hide how he’s still favouring his left shoulder either.Seth shakes his head slowly. "That’s not — That’s not what I meant. I meant —Youscared me for a minute there."





	all i have

**Author's Note:**

> After their match at No Mercy.

It’s only after — after when they’re away from the cameras and the lights. When they’re _alone_ and free to collapse from exhaustion, free to shed the brave, defiant faces they have to keep on for the crowd. It’s only _now_ that he can finally look Dean in the eyes and say it out loud.

"I was scared for a bit there," he admits.

Dean just shrugs it off, like it’s nothing. "Nah, it was fine. I mean, we cut it pretty close at the end, but that’s just how we work best."

Maybe _he_ hasn’t entirely taken off his armour yet, but he can’t hide how he’s still favouring his left shoulder either.

Seth shakes his head slowly. "That’s not — That’s not what I meant. I meant — _You_ scared me for a minute there."

It was _more_ than a minute, though. It was practically the entire match, from Dean’s shoulder hitting those steps to getting powerbombed right into his chest to watching him being lined up to eat a boot to the face, as Seth's heart skipped a beat, absolutely helpless to stop any of it. It’s _more_ than that — it’s the unnervingly realistic dreams he’s been having way too often for a while, only now it’s not just _Seth_ hurting Dean over and over again — it’s everything and everyone and he can’t do anything about it but _watch_ as it happens.

Sometimes, he wakes up in the middle of the night and the only thing that can calm his racing heart is staring across the room at Dean’s sleeping form — safe and real and breathing — for what feels like hours before he can finally fall asleep again.

 _Dean’s_ the one staring at him now, like he’s not sure what to say to that.

"I know," Seth says quickly, before he can speak. "I know it’s — it’s stupid. I mean, this is what we _do_. And people get hurt. Really badly, sometimes. I just — I don’t know what I’d do if that was _you_."

It’s a lot, he knows. People like them don’t talk about this stuff. It’s easier to just push it to back of your mind every single time you step foot in the ring. And maybe he has no right to put any of his anxiety on Dean. Not when _Seth’s_ been the cause of his pain countless times over. But he finds that he doesn’t care that much, to be honest. Because he and Dean — there’s _nothing_ that compares to what they have with each other. And he took it for granted once. But never again.

Something’s _changed_ in Dean’s face — maybe it was hearing the palpable fear and vulnerability in Seth’s voice — but he looks conflicted, somewhere in between confused and genuinely concerned, almost taken aback by Seth’s sudden, unwavering honesty.

"Hey, I’m okay," he reassures him. "I’ve been through much worse than that before. And I probably will go through much worse again. I’m still _here_ , you know?"

Seth gives him a soft smile, nods. "Yeah, you are. And that’s a good thing." Seth doesn't even know how to begin to tell him that he wishes more than anything that he never had to get hurt like that ever again.

"So, don’t go all weepy on me, alright?" Dean says, returning his smile with a stupidly charming grin. "The _best tag team in the world_ don’t have anything to worry about. We’re all good, man."

Seth nods again, almost to himself this time. "I know," he tells him truthfully. "But it’s hard not to worry, you know? Especially when you’re getting hurt and I — I can’t do anything about it. Because you’re — you’re kind of all I have."

Okay, that’s _definitely_ a lot. But it’s true. And that’s all that matters.

Dean’s eyes just go comically wide for a moment before he just goes still and quiet, like he’s processing that.

"That’s kind of heavy — to put on someone like that, you know —"

Seth flinches at little at Dean’s words, shakes his head, already realising his huge mistake. "Yeah, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said —"

" _No_ ," Dean cuts him off immediately. "Don’t be sorry. I just — I’m just not used to being — you know — whatever." 

"Yeah, I know," Seth says quietly. It kind of breaks his heart a little, knowing that Dean finds it strange to be so important to someone else. "We can, you know, talk about this some other time. I’m just happy that I’m _here_. With you. Again."

"I should, uh, I should go get this damn thing checked out," Dean says after a few moments, patting his injured shoulder with his other hand and then wincing.

"Yeah, you go do that. I’ll, uh, I'll see you later." 

Seth’s just turned to head to the showers when Dean calls out to him again.

"Seth. Wait."

Seth turns to meet his eyes again and it looks like he’s visibly struggling with something before he manages to get the words out.

"Uh, what you said before. I know how you feel." He takes a breath. "This — _you_ — you mean a lot to me," he says earnestly. "And I’m really glad I could do all of this with you, too."

He reaches out and squeezes Seth’s hand for a second or two before letting go. Seth’s heart stops beating again, but it’s a _good_ kind of feeling this time.

He silently watches Dean’s back as he walks away, and he thinks maybe he can rest a little easier now.


End file.
